Fall TV Blog

He coined many of this season’s most quotable lines — “top scallop” and “monkey ass in an empty clam shell” — and cooked with his heart full of Italian bravado, but Wednesday night Fabio Viviani, 30, was dismissed from the competition just short of making it to the Top Chef finale. Calling from his California restaurant, the bon vivant opened up — in his very distinct words — about his non-alliance with fellow European Stefan and how his mother thinks he’s a Google star. –Brian Orloff

Personality-wise, you seemed to be this season’s breakout star. Do you crack yourself up?
I don’t because that’s myself. It’s like if you try to tell a joke with nobody’s in the room. At the end, even if it’s a fun joke, you’re not going to laugh. [But] I’m very personable. If you have the chance to meet me, we’re going to have a good time together. I work in the people business.

Did you have a favorite one-liner of the season? Maybe your “Top Scallop” comment?
I didn’t even remember that I said those things. But what I said,
and I really mean it, if I did need it, I [would] chop my finger off,
sear it on a flattop and deal with nine finger after that.

You’re talking about when you injured your hand. What happened exactly?
I wear tennis shoes in the kitchen — which is not a good — and I turned the corner and I fell flat with my hand underneath my flank. The finger got dislocated and swollen and it was really red. It hurt, [but] I didn’t even ask for a medic. I asked for a fork and a bandage so I could be able to put it straight by myself.

You won that challenge despite the injury, so it didn’t seem to hurt you.
At the end [I had to cook] roasted chicken and roasted potatoes, so it was not really a brainer. It was a good challenge for me. That’s what I do: good, simple food. If you want a foo-foo stuff, if you look for paint on a plate, you better go to a museum or somewhere else.

You talked about your mom being sick. How is she doing?
The show is kind of exaggerated a little bit. My mom is not dying. She has a problem that she cannot move her hand. Her body produced too much calcium and the bone in the wrist is calcifying. It can’t be cured. Every six months she needs to have a surgery or else she’ll be completely paralyzed. It’s an expensive and stressful thing. But she’s hanging in there.

Is she proud of how far you got in the competition?
You know what? She doesn’t even know what’s going on. She know I’m on the show, but it’s hard to realize your son is on national TV because in Italy we don’t have these things. In Italy, if you are going on TV, it’s because you killed a whole family somewhere or you robbed a bank. So it doesn’t really happen that you are on national TV for something good. My mom, she was very happy. She told me she saw me on Google. And I told her, “Mom. I’m not on Google. Google is a search engine.”

Talk about your relationship with Stefan — and your European alliance.
Stefan is a good competitor. He had one chance to lose — and that chance was me. Now that I’m gone, he’s going to win. But the thing is this one: It’s not a European alliance. I go along with people who have a good sense of humor – and he has a good sense of humor. I respect him so much and that’s why I got very well along with him.

Our Top Chef 5 Burning Questions:
Describe your Top Chef experience in one word.
Brutal.

What is in your refrigerator right now?
I guess there are some spring rolls, some Diet Coke, some Dr. Pepper and some chips.

Name one food you cannot stand.
Cilantro. I hate it from the deepest of my heart. And if one day if I’ll be
filthy rich. I’m going to buy 20 acres, I’ll grow cilantro, and then I’m
going to fly over with a combat airplane and drop an “m” bomb on the field and blow the whole thing up.

Pick your favorite fast-food restaurant.
In-N-Out is pretty good. “Animal style.” No pickle. I hate pickle too.

Gail or Toby?
Gail she’s a sweetheart, and she’s more pleasing to look at. Toby’s a very good person to me but way uglier than Gail. But I like the humor of Toby, so I’ll let you pick one. I’m happy with both.

Michal Lavine/Bravo